I'm sure at some point of your life, you meet dishonest people and you're taken advantage of. It makes you angry, and it question your faith not just in humanity, but also.. your self-worth.
As a freelance/ indie designer, this is nothing new to me. Many consignees do not pay up on time, or better still, some would try to avoid paying you at all. These people would come out with tons of excuses. Some impressive ones I came across include, 'Oh, we've already mailed out your cheque. Maybe we've sent it to the wrong address.', 'Oh, I'm so sorry, I thought I've already replied you.'.. And my all time favourite has to be, 'I'm having a depression...' (Right! I'm having a depression because of you too!) This particular woman is darn good at coming out with all the award winning reasons every month and they'd always be one that pulls on your emotional string. Check this out, 'I'm sick.', 'I'm in the hospital.', 'I'm still having my depression.', 'My dad just passed away.' (I swear I'm not lying). Thank God, she didn't tell me she's having menopause.
This went on for a year. Yes, she did pay me after months of pursuing, BUT more often than not, her cheque would be problematic. Finally one day, I came to my senses. I decided to pull out my works from her store and demanded for my outstanding payment. Not surprisingly, she used the tactic she knew best. When I would not take her shit no more, she told me, 'I have no money.' Suddenly everything became even clearer to me. She has been taking my kindness as a weakness all those while when I'd choose to give her the benefit of doubt. Things turned ugly when I threatened to go to the Small Claims Tribunal. Anyway, fast forward that horrible experience, I managed to get back my merchandise and money from that store (and many other stores).
Since those unpleasant experiences, I'd cut down on consignment partnership and direct my attention to copyright licensing. Recently, something similar happened. This art publishing wholesale company from US approached me to give them the right to use my artwork. After everything has been agreed; contract signed, artworks emailed to them, they slowly disappeared. Few weeks ago, this guy told me he was busy at some trade show and promised to get in touch when he returned the following week. But you guessed it, he disappeared when I emailed him again weeks later. Well.. It has been a year since I worked with them AND I HAVE NOT RECEIVED A SINGLE CENT. I can't understand why people would do such a thing. Does it makes them happy to know they'd successfully make another fool believe in them?
I get upset with people who hurt me and violate my trust, but try as I might, I can never bring myself to hate them. You can call me naive or stupid (I guess I'm both. Sigh). I may hate the thing someone did to me but I can never hate them as a person. I always believe everyone has a kind nature and I choose to see the good in them. Sadly, the society may have turned them into someone 'unlikeable', but the soul always remain pure and kind.
Sometimes we just have to let go of the thing doesn't make us happy to make space for the thing that does. Be thankful for the experience and what we've learned from it, then move on.
What have you been holding on to? It's time to let go.
Afterall, we deserve to be happy. :)
❤ Xoxo, Rheea.